As I mentioned earlier, I spending time on my little corner of the interweb hasn’t been my number one priority. Along with trying to balance working full-time, studying part-time, keeping fit and exercising, spending time with friends, spending time with the boyfriend, and having some me time, blogging got pushed further and further down the list. Part of me felt guilty about neglecting my little corner and not posting daily, even weekly at points, but part of me has kind of felt a relief.
I know my little corner of the internet is comparably teeny tiny compared to others, but reading other blogs regularly and logging onto instagram/twitter etc has left me with a severe case of falling into the comparison trap. I’ve thought that why should I bother when I don’t have x amount of readers, followers, commenters, and I can’t get my blog to look the way others do, and I don’t take photos like others do etc. It started to feel really competitive, and at times quite a negative place to spend my free time. Not so much the blog posts themselves, but the social media and conversations that go along side it, and I guess I don’t think choosing to spend time in a negative environment that leaves me feeling inadequate is the best use of my time, especially when I could be doing things that make me happy.
I guess, at the end of the day, this is my blog and I should make it into something I would read first and foremost, and worry about everything else later. Don’t get me wrong, I think some competition is good, but right now the only person I want to be competing with is myself. I’ve felt pressured to agree to every email that comes my way because I thought it some weird logic that I must be a good blogger if I’m getting approached for things, but actually now I think some of the things have kind of been a bit sell-out-ish, and I’m sorry. I know I’m not superwoman and trying to do all that I have on my plate at the moment and try to keep some sort of blog on par with people who have far more time than me/do it full-time is completely unrealistic. So, I’m not giving up blogging at all, I just wanted to explain why I haven’t been here so much (I’m not even sure why I feel like I should need to explain??), and maybe as with all things blog related, have the opportunity to look back on this and remember how I felt at the end of November 2014!
Sorry for another brain dump, I guess I’ve just had a lot on my mind!